1. (12.2 minutes)
    Not enough of you have listened to this, as I am maybe half of the current playcount, but you should: I know I have said this about Scott's little stories before, but they are kind of the greatest.  This one is less little, but not in a way where the greatness is diluted.

    It is probably at least on par with David Foster Wallace’s “The Boy"—which I love and still listen to about once a month—if not a little better because of sort of being reminiscent of High School Hypnosis*; which I also love as someone who was also on the school assembly circuit as a traveling, singing, educational puppeteer. 

    (*As far as I know, neither I nor Mark Riley, the KotB cerebral pasly puppet, ever gave any children boners on stage.  Thank goodness.)

     
  2. 23:42 31st Aug 2014

    Notes: 3

    Mrrrrn, I’ve had this nightmare before. Look at that jerk.

    Too many monkeys, (no ruined ponies, not enough typewriters for anthology compilations, I still don’t own a circus). At least one of them finished her Kung Fu Doctorate (most people don’t: it’s like a Berklee thing where not graduating is normal enough; and leaving with a Master’s in Kung Fu is maybe for run-of-the-mill overachievers) and consequently thinks the “Enter the Dragon” solution would surely both leave quite a trace on the rice paper and get all banned from science museums.
    So, for now, it’s a détente.
    Rather: millions of crossed detentes.

    (It comes down to optics a little. The one of millions making eye-contact in each image: she is likely the hero; slap her direct opposite upside the head first: that one is most likely your villain. It is, however, all a distraction: the Thomas-Crown-shaming heist will go down regardless. That’s how we do.)

     
  3. 13:32 30th Aug 2014

    Notes: 4

    image: Download

    From the licensers of the movie “Solidified”, which spawned the hit song “Allow it to Leave”; 

Tuber Treats may never be the same!

    From the licensers of the movie “Solidified”, which spawned the hit song “Allow it to Leave”;

    Tuber Treats may never be the same!

     
  4. 16:06 29th Aug 2014

    Notes: 5

    image: Download

    "You know those guitars that are, like, double guitars?"

    "You know those guitars that are, like, double guitars?"

     
  5. "My Dinner With Pharrell"

    1. W: Are you happy?
    2. E: ...Jesus, that question shouldn't feel so heavy, should it? Are YOU happy?
    3. W: For a person not naturally inclined to be happy, I think most days I am about as happy as I can be.
     
  6. image: Download

    Kinda unfortunate that I can’t bring myself to toot again and disturb the  numerical syzygy.  Well, “kinda unfortunate” in that it happened after some truly C⁺ Thundercats related musing, mostly.

    Kinda unfortunate that I can’t bring myself to toot again and disturb the numerical syzygy. Well, “kinda unfortunate” in that it happened after some truly C⁺ Thundercats related musing, mostly.

     
  7. image: Download

    The Question:  Did you break your own rule—regarding the impropriety of rapping women of pallor (excluding Debbie Harry)—in order to definitely not impress upon a beautiful young kangaroo of a Melbourne-and-raised spectroscopist (you may remember him from such anecdotes as: the time the author slightly exaggerated an interest in learning the rules of cricket, based on a very real interest in the rules of Whack-Bat, toward encouraging ANY sort of conversational interaction) the pervasive hegemony of American popular-culture IN the middle of a fairly fancy scientist dinner at a high end Swiss restaurant? 

The Answer: Does a bear shit in the far far far West Philadelphia woods?  (Like Central PA far.)  It was kind of glorious as it came from a place of truthiness: on a playground WAS where I spent most of my days.  An indoor voice was used, if that makes it any better. 

Later, I totally got appreciative nods from the other Aussies at the table for dropping some science vis à vis the 90’s animated series “Rocko’s Modern Life” and giving a scene by scene verbal description of the Men at Work song most appropriate to their home.

    The Question: Did you break your own rule—regarding the impropriety of rapping women of pallor (excluding Debbie Harry)—in order to definitely not impress upon a beautiful young kangaroo of a Melbourne-and-raised spectroscopist (you may remember him from such anecdotes as: the time the author slightly exaggerated an interest in learning the rules of cricket, based on a very real interest in the rules of Whack-Bat, toward encouraging ANY sort of conversational interaction) the pervasive hegemony of American popular-culture IN the middle of a fairly fancy scientist dinner at a high end Swiss restaurant?

    The Answer: Does a bear shit in the far far far West Philadelphia woods? (Like Central PA far.) It was kind of glorious as it came from a place of truthiness: on a playground WAS where I spent most of my days. An indoor voice was used, if that makes it any better.

    Later, I totally got appreciative nods from the other Aussies at the table for dropping some science vis à vis the 90’s animated series “Rocko’s Modern Life” and giving a scene by scene verbal description of the Men at Work song most appropriate to their home.

     
  8. 01:02

    Notes: 1

    image: Download

    …Do I dare to eat a peach?

    …Do I dare to eat a peach?

     
  9. Magazines on the (not busty) front rack of Mea Culpa, the totally real Sex Shop down the street:

    Sorry
    Lo Siento
    Please Let Me Try Again
    This Never Happens
    I Haven’t Slept Much Lately
    You Look Nice Today.

    Melius est omnia cum linguis formale!

    (The picture would be better but there was a gang is somewhat menacing looking ladies that seemed to indicate maybe this was not an ideal photo op location.)

     
  10. 10:00 24th Aug 2014

    Notes: 4

    Plays: 98

    3 years in, still the greatest thing.

    (Source: 5by5.tv)

     
  11. On Friday when the engineers were leaving for the day and said “Have a nice weekend” I replied “Have a nice week” and we ended up suddenly information dumping the fact that I was going to an international conference and it was a weird moment of realizing that my life is not quite like their lives.

    My professional-tag-team partner decided at the last minute that he is not coming, so after I got the stress barfs squared away and remembered I travel alone all the time—and pitch stronger when it’s just me and the data—I am now in go-mode. (Hobos like me, baby: I was born to hustle…as men yell at me in German? Swiss? The airplane is yelling in…French? Uhoh. I should remember. I’ve done Switzerland before, surely it’ll be like riding a lingual bike. That’s maybe a little crass.).

    I’ll see an old boss; we’ll tell pointed jokes about the manuscripts I owe him in English. And I just ran into a chemical ionization guy who is super fun, I think I even packed the breathalyzer, this is going to be disastrous. Everything is gonna be fine. Few things are mutually exclusive.

    Standard travel rules apply, be awesome in my pseudo-absence.

     
  12. In fairness to their Amazon categorization, I DO find many moments in both Avengers and Skyfall to be quite touching.

    Indeed, the last 12 minutes of the former are always queued up as a cinematic lachrymator, just because I like a catharsis on call. I feel like one could make the argument on all of these.

     
  13. 10:09 21st Aug 2014

    Notes: 2

    Reviewers’ Comment Replies

    "I am delighted to inform you that the manuscript has been reviewed by the experts in the field, and the consensus is that it is acceptable with a minor revision."

    Boom.  There is something pretty intellectually delicious about submitting something to a journal of a field a little bit tangential to the my own, so I am delighted to receive this information and make this revision.

    "Too verbose"

    The quasi-redundancy of this comment is clearly pedant bait.  I may not have a giant fish head, but I know a trap when I see one. 

     
  14. image: Download

    When I was a kid, the simple process of a nurse taking my blood pressure would increase my blood pressure. Like to the point that it was worried that I was at risk of hypertension. (And, as I was/am a pudgy kid, that wouldn’t have been unreasonable.) It was, essentially, my introduction to the observer effect.
At some point during my postdoc, I found one of those BP robots over in the supercomputer building at ORNL. And it became a thing I would visit. A digital pal I would do a walk by/quick sit with every day. I imagine it was the feeling someone would get playing the lottery, though I have no idea if that’s accurate. They were, however, much better numbers.
And then in my interregnum vacation, I found myself sort of craving those little visits; that tiny arm hug, that quick experimental replicate, those few bits of data. I found it comforting. I would find them in stores. I would look for them at malls. Just a couple minutes, a couple hugs, a tiny respite. Who would name a child “Temple Grandin”? And here we are.
I have a borderline disconcerting number of these cards. This one just fell out of my bag. Inadvertent shedding usually means “time for a purge”. And low is usually my problem more than high—I could fix that with some ramen, though. I like the store ones still, but I own 2 sphygmomanometers, one at home and one at work.
I also enjoy stethoscopes. It almost always starts slowly.
I was married to a dumb idea for like 2 weeks and it was a ridiculous source of unnecessary stress and once I decided I could just get around it I blew a 120/79. 
(I’ll use “blow” as a measurement verb, sure. I also own a breathalyzer.) I have done some really interesting research.

    When I was a kid, the simple process of a nurse taking my blood pressure would increase my blood pressure. Like to the point that it was worried that I was at risk of hypertension. (And, as I was/am a pudgy kid, that wouldn’t have been unreasonable.) It was, essentially, my introduction to the observer effect.

    At some point during my postdoc, I found one of those BP robots over in the supercomputer building at ORNL. And it became a thing I would visit. A digital pal I would do a walk by/quick sit with every day. I imagine it was the feeling someone would get playing the lottery, though I have no idea if that’s accurate. They were, however, much better numbers.

    And then in my interregnum vacation, I found myself sort of craving those little visits; that tiny arm hug, that quick experimental replicate, those few bits of data. I found it comforting. I would find them in stores. I would look for them at malls. Just a couple minutes, a couple hugs, a tiny respite. Who would name a child “Temple Grandin”? And here we are.

    I have a borderline disconcerting number of these cards. This one just fell out of my bag. Inadvertent shedding usually means “time for a purge”. And low is usually my problem more than high—I could fix that with some ramen, though. I like the store ones still, but I own 2 sphygmomanometers, one at home and one at work.

    I also enjoy stethoscopes.
    It almost always starts slowly.

    I was married to a dumb idea for like 2 weeks and it was a ridiculous source of unnecessary stress and once I decided I could just get around it I blew a 120/79.

    (I’ll use “blow” as a measurement verb, sure. I also own a breathalyzer.)
    I have done some really interesting research.

     
  15. image: Download

    Though I do love a rhyming rule of thumb and will never fully discount nominative determinism—¡ nomen est omen !—
Jo clearly transcended her waitress name to become a scientist whose labcoat I still actively avoided when hunting for a visitor coat last week. 

(She’s *Hollandaise!*)

    Though I do love a rhyming rule of thumb and will never fully discount nominative determinism
    —¡ nomen est omen !—
    Jo clearly transcended her waitress name to become a scientist whose labcoat I still actively avoided when hunting for a visitor coat last week.

    (She’s *Hollandaise!*)